“You won’t find anything. The IRS was pretty thorough.”
Ha. Good one. Take my upvote and thank you for your service.
“After this can you write a note for my wife to tell her my head is not, in fact, up my ass?”
“My safe word is pineapple”
Ross Matthews!
With your rectum. The man sees you crush a piece of ice with that sphincter, you command some respect for the rest of the procedure.
Ask them if they’ll be shooting in hidef 4k or IMAX.
I had to get my ass checked and the doctor was surprised at my lack of shame or discomfort with it. When it was over he said “don’t come back just for this okay?”
You’re going to want to avoid looking like a huge ass. I’d avoid jokes that shit on their career choice.
Ask them if they’re going to buy you dinner first.
Ask them what their Twitch handle is because your friends want to watch the live-stream.
I have a colonoscopy tomorrow, so I’m definitely going to use one of these!
Put a joke on a post it note and place it between your butt cheeks.
“We’ve been trying to reach you about your vehicle’s extended warranty”
You won’t need to break the ice when your ass squirts shit water allover his hand and bed
Heck, it was basically all water by that point, 24 hours of laxatives will do that ;)
Potable even.
Colonoscopy is easy, it’s endoscopy that felt like near dear experience (I didn’t take the sedative= fail). Worth it though. Also the Dr’s and techs were far to busy talking about the next hairpin bend like they were rally driving. The satnav on the screen shows how far the scope has gone, I shit you not it really looks like the old Nokia snake gane. And when you have nitrous gas it all becomes very funny.
I once woke up during an upper endoscopy. It wasn’t a pleasant experience. The anesthesiologist noticed pretty fast though and put me back out.
Puppet Show?
Absurd, love it.
Tell them if they find $2.10 worth of nickels, they’ll have almost recovered it all.
