Feel that all dating apps nowadays are an absolute scam so curious if anyone here has actually had any success with dating apps and if so what app what is it?

  • jjjalljs@ttrpg.network
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    10 months ago

    I can see where you’re coming from.

    However! Two counter arguments.

    One. Saying “hey” changes their view of you. It’s very possible that opening with “hey” will actually shift their opinion of you towards negative. To me (and friends I’ve talked to) it comes off as very low effort, which is unappealed.

    Two. You’re going to need to write a better message anyway. Some people might have success with the “hey” “hey” “how’re you?” “Good u?” flow but I really strongly recommend not doing that. It takes longer, a lot of people dislike it, and you’re going to eventually have to write something better anyway. Opening with a good message saves you time overall.

    Sending a good initial message saves you time overall and increases your success rate.

    • runjun@lemmy.world
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      10 months ago

      I completely understand and I kind of agree that it’s low effort. However, my experience was that my “high effort messages” received maybe a 1/10th of the responses that got with hey. And then if factor in how many less people I was messaging because I was tailoring it then the amount of interested responses was significantly less.

      Again, if it’s an app like tinder where you both have to show interest then I wouldn’t start with hey. Otherwise I view it as just showing interest and then if they respond then I can follow it up with something from their profile.

      But I’ve been out of that scene for a decade so I have to imagine with enshitification that online dating is now even worse.