Hi, I’m 46 years old and have had a diagnosis since childhood ( was call add then). And without getting to much into it have had many challenges throughout my life. I’m in a good place now where my own Strahles coupled with therapy and medication help me manage things. Up until very recently i felt like this was something to overcome with willpower but now I’m more like this is a storm I just need to ride along with an do my best. I work in software development and in my current job I’m ramping up to take on a lot more responsibilities and leadership. I’ll be dealing with people alot more as a result and I basically am looking for advice on what to do in those moments when I recognize I’m being too “much” without just having to explain that I’m neurodivergent or that I have ADHD. i know I can meet the expectations set in front of me i’m just looking to see how to smooth over the rough patches.
I’ll throw my hat in. Get an idea of what his goal is, ask him to lay it out in steps. Tell him you’d like to focus on just one throughline before you move to the next. When he overwhelms you let him know that it’s distracting.
Most importantly though, start working on your resume, because you’re working at a company that refuses to manage expectations and does not support you. If one Engineer is causing high turnover like that and management doesn’t care, that’s a big red flag.
In this situation, we are both management level. I don’t think anyone has tried to just flat out tell him he’s making a mess of things and distracting people. Maybe being upfront about it could help avoid repeating history.
Bingo.