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Joined 2 years ago
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Cake day: January 17th, 2024

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  • If you can’t figure it, that’s not the answer. That was my point. Try something else. Take a step back. For example, “why does it matter that people are imperfect and hurt you?” “why are these the only two options?” “Can someone else see a different path?”

    See if maybe those are problems you can solve more easily.

    That is my point. Someone can give you things to try, but you have to try and evaluate yourself. No human or machine can do that for you.

    If it doesn’t work, it doesn’t work. Try to solve the puzzle a different way. That’s what therapy or counseling, or even coaching is supposed to help you do. But not do it for you.





  • Maybe you should use the time you aren’t ‘wasting’ on Google, because this is incorrect.

    Licensing is local. Your state or country will set the requirements to get licensed to practice under a ‘protected designation’ (as Licensed Therapist, Registered Clinical Social Worker, etc.).

    Sometimes this requires a Master’s level degree, sometimes a Doctorate.

    In North America at least, supervised training happens for all Mental Health professionals at the Master’s Level. Usually hundreds of hours to accompany formal examination. This separate from licensing.

    The exact number changes locally, but licensing usually requires even more at-work supervision, they usually have two or more levels, you move from provisional to full after you have enough supervised hours as a licensed professional. A process that takes years.

    This isn’t why you would go to someone with a Doctorate. That level is about specialization or research. If you have treatment-resistent depression, for example, you might need someone with special training or experience.

    They will all be just as expensive, but that’s because the US treats health as a paid privilege.


  • I was going to say this. The reality is you can do well with a mediocre therapist, because it is actually 80% about you. You do the work, you answer the questions, you decide, you change.

    To me, it sounds like the first therapist was trying to do the right thing. Help YOU think about what is going to ACTUALLY work.

    But instead you kept hoping they would say a magic word and fix you. It doesn’t work like that. Nobody will know you better than yourself. You talk to them for an hour, and might be bullshiting them, you are with yourself 24/7.

    The way to do therapy is to think. If you don’t know the answer to the question “How do I stop gooning?” Then the work is to figure it out. Like a puzzle. You might need to ask more questions: Why don’t you know? What can you do to find the answers? What would it look like if you did have the answers? And so on. But those are quesitons for YOU not for the therapist.

    The therapist is there to help you think and give you options.