Who cares, as long as they’re not disproportionately represented, which is exactly what’s happening with the current class system.

I don’t even care anymore that George will never finish the books. At this point I wish he would just admit he’s given up and stop lying and leading people on.

If Nike launched a line of formal wear it would be called Nichael.

I like my women just like my coffee:

• Bitter.
• Very likely to burn me.
• Impossible to read.

And not buying stuff that comes from slaughterhouses and factory farms.

Reminds me of that olive oil coffee Starbucks was selling that caused people to shit their pants.

Weird, at my company they changed it to “flesh asset repair and removal.”

I was just being cheeky. I’m never going to be in a situation where I need parts for one of these garbage vehicles, and anyone who does has no sympathy from me.

Who would have imagined that a department called “human resources” wouldn’t have your best interests in mind?

God: "This little guy is called a ‘wolf’. He may look cute, but don’t get too close. He’s got sharp teeth, he hunts in a pack, and he’ll hang out on the edge of your village, steal your food and kill your livestock.

Humans: crying “I can change him!”

On the plus side, they should be quite easy to salvage for parts considering the paneling peels off with very little effort.

God: “Ok, fine I guess. You guys are no fun.”

Watch Buggin With Ruud, a 2005 nature documentary about bugs.

Could you imagine the stories that would circulate in the playgrounds? “I heard the Linux fairy is close. Timmy can’t play Roblox in class anymore.”

For a while I was just dumping my discard into a hot oiled pan to make a nice little pancake. Some scallions, sesame seeds and teriyaki sauce for toppings. It’s a lot to eat on the regular though.

Whoever loses, America wins.