The year is 2082
Hollywood will not take any risks.
The only actors are the reanimated corpses of Tom Cruise, Scarlett Johansson, Zoe Saldana, Samuel L Jackson, Tom Hanks, and Harrison Ford, all de-aged back to life with VFX.
The only films are Fast 43, Avengers vs The Spider-Verse XIV, Indiana Jones 22, Star Wars Episode XXI: Revenge of the Return, Toy Story 25, Avatar 5, and The Lion King: The Animation of The Broadway production of the Re-animated Live Action: 3D Extended Edition.
What really got me in this great list was Avatar franchise only made it to Avatar 5 in all those years! 😂
And he still moved and sounded 80 years old…
Call me blasphemous, but I in fact quite liked the fourth Indy movie. It hit all the right notes for me, nostalgia-wise. I’m curious to see what this one is like.
It’s bad in different ways. The action, despite being full of CGI, is much more grounded and doesn’t have the crazy over the top moments like nuking the fridge or swinging with the monkeys. But the writing is pretty terrible with major characters and story lines just getting forgotten, bad guys that can teleport around to show up whenever they are needed and character arcs skipping the actual arc and problems just magically resolving themselves.
Despite all it’s problems I still enjoyed it, since you can kind of see there being a good Indiana Jones movie under all the problems. But it’s really a mess of a movie if you think too much about it. Movie studios really need to start spending some of their hundred million budget on getting the scripts fixed before they start filming. Kind of inexcusable to spend $300 million and have the result look like it’s held together by duct tape.
Two tickets to Star Wars, please
Give me an hour with stable diffusion and I’ll do it.
